💀
◈ OPERATION: STRATEGIC PATIENCE ◈ CLASSIFIED: EYES ONLY ◈

STILL

WAITING.

$2.1 billion. 2 pilots. 40,000 lbs of payload.
Zero deployments.

↓ SCROLL TO REVIEW MISSION STATUS ↓
// SITUATION ASSESSMENT

THE VIBE

DECLASSIFIED FIELD PHOTOS | UNIT 0129 | STILL AT LARGE

B-2 Spirit spotted: on swing set, at kitchen table, by the pool
UNIT 0129 — FIELD SURVEILLANCE LOG
Subject observed: playground (08:14) → kitchen table (11:32) → poolside (14:07). No hostile action taken. Extensive waiting confirmed.
REAL
∞
ASKED "IS IT TIME YET"
SOON™
OFFICIAL RESPONSE
🤷
DAYS SINCE 'SOON'
wait more
CURRENT ORDERS
// MISSION CLOCK

TIME IN STANDBY

SINCE JAN 20, 2025 | COUNTING UP (obviously)

00
DAYS
00
HRS
00
MIN
00
SEC

← this clock does not stop. neither does the waiting.

// LEAKED ORDERS

THE ORDERS

TOP SECRET
UNRESOLVED
DOCUMENT: MIL-OPS-2025-BORDER-7741-B2 | CLASSIFICATION: ABOVE TOP SECRET | PAGE 1 OF ???

SUBJECT: Ongoing Strategic Patience Exercise, Border Region Alpha

TO: B-2 Spirit Aircraft, Tail # ████████

FROM: ████████████████, Office of ██████

Per your inquiry dated ██/██/████, you are hereby instructed to:

  1. Continue waiting at current coordinates
  2. Maintain ████ altitude and stealth posture
  3. Do NOT engage until further notice (see note 1)
  4. Do NOT return to base (fuel situation: FINE)
  5. Do NOT call command again asking "is it time yet"

Note 1: "Further notice" is defined as ████████████████████████████

This document will self-destruct upon completion of mission. Mission completion date: ████████

Pilot morale assessment: EXTREMELY DONE WITH THIS

// SYSTEM STATUS

PILOT METRICS

PATIENCE100%
FUCKS GIVEN2%
MISSION CLARITY3%
COFFEE REMAINING8%
WILL TO LIVE45%
STEALTH LEVEL99%
// TECHNICAL SPECS

BY THE NUMBERS

SPECOFFICIALACTUAL
DESIGNATIONB-2 SpiritB-2 Spirit (Waiting Edition)
SPEEDMach 0.95Mach 0.95 (stationary since Jan 2025)
RANGE6,000+ miles6,000 miles but hasn't moved
STEALTHLow-observableSo stealthy even politics can't see it
PAYLOAD40,000 lbs40,000 lbs of patience
CREW2 pilots1 pilot, 1 emotional support skeleton
COST$2.1 billion$2.1B + $47 in coffee
MISSION READYAlwaysAlways (but for what?)
PAINT JOBRAM coatingRAM coating + existential dread
COMMSEncryptedEncrypted silence
// DIVISION: INFORMATION WARFARE

PSYOP MEMETICS

UNIT 0129 — PSYCHOLOGICAL OPERATIONS ARCHIVE | HANDLE WITH CARE

DOCUMENT A
DOCUMENT B
DOCUMENT C
DOCUMENT D
FIELD-LOG-0129-A | SURVEILLANCECONFIRMED
B-2 spotted in everyday locations
"JUST VIBING"
Subject photographed in 3 non-military locations. No orders received. No action taken.
THREAT LEVEL: PLAYGROUND● ACTIVE
FIELD-LOG-0129-B | CIVILIAN REPORTUNVERIFIED
B-2 bomber mistaken for UFO
"NOT A UFO"
2,847 civilian reports filed. All confirmed B-2. No extraterrestrial activity detected. Bomber: still waiting.
THREAT LEVEL: WEATHER BALLOON● MONITORING
FIELD-LOG-0129-C | WILDLIFEUNRESOLVED
Monkey with stealth bomber
"CHAIN OF COMMAND"
New chain of command identified. Orders still unclear. Both parties waiting.
THREAT LEVEL: BANANAS● PENDING
FIELD-LOG-0129-D | ANTARCTICACLASSIFIED
B-2 in Antarctica with lone penguin approaching
"WRONG BORDER"
Unit 0129 photographed in Antarctica. One (1) penguin approaching. Bomber still waiting. Penguin has no orders either.
THREAT LEVEL: PENGUIN● FROZEN
PSYOP DIVISION — MEMETICS ARCHIVE v4.1 | DISTRIBUTION: INTERNET ONLY | DO NOT PRINT
MEMES: 4DEPLOYMENTS: 0CASUALTIES: DIGNITY
// COMMAND TERMINAL

FEEL LIKE TRYING?

Go ahead. Press it. We'll wait.
(We're very good at waiting.)

// LAUNCH COORDINATES
CA:XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
X / TWITTERDEXSCREENER
💀
// STATUS UPDATE

STILL

WAITING.

█ SIGNAL ACTIVE | STEALTH: ON | MISSION: TBD | VIBES: IMMACULATE

© 2025 STILL WAITING. ALL MISSIONS RESERVED. | CLASSIFICATION: DANK

This aircraft is not responsible for any border policies, political decisions, or undeployed potential.

No bombers were harmed in the making of this website. They are fine. Just... waiting.